As a teenager I made life very difficult for those around me. Teachers, students, my pastor, my sisters and perhaps especially my parents. I don’t need to go into details here but I pushed my parents to the brink on numerous occasions I’m sure. It got to a point where no one really knew what to do with me. I was selfish, belligerent and determined to do whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted to do it.
For example, in grade 10, I missed more classes than I attended. No, I wasn’t the exceptional student (Patch Adams for example) who only needed to show up for tests and exams because he knew the material. My average for the year was below 50%…brilliant right?
Continually making poor choices and living a lifestyle that went against everything my parents taught me made life extremely difficult at home. I remember something that my dad would say to me, mostly out of frustration and discouragement I think.
He said, “Dan, anyone can do what you’re doing.”
The first time he said it, I didn’t really understand what he meant. But I remember thinking, “Are you kidding me? I dare you to find someone who was like me, doing the things I was doing and doing them with such disregard and contempt for anyone else. No one I knew was taking more risks or breaking more rules. What do you mean anyone can do what I’m doing?”
In my narrow perspective, as far as I was concerned, I was knocking it out of the park. Crazy right?
Over time, my dad would repeat those words to me again and again. “Anyone can do what you are doing” And what he was trying to say to me, was…
- You are so much better than you are now.
- You have so much more potential but you are taking the easy way out.
- You can be so much more but you are settling for a mediocre life.
- Instead of living your best life you are wasting it.
As I look back on that time, my dad was exactly right. Of course with me, the evidence was overwhelming clear and obvious. When your life consists of
- Spending more time in pool halls than the classroom
- Playing golf with laid-off factory workers because you dropped out of school
- Stealing at every opportunity to support a less than honourable lifestyle
- Taking advantage of people and showing no respect to anyone
Coming to the conclusion that I wasn’t living my best life was pretty easy.
But enough about me.
Key #3 Live Your BEST Life Now
What about you? Are you living your BEST life now? Hey, I’m not suggesting that like me as a teenager you are wasting your life or living a mediocre life or taking the easy way out. I’m not saying that at all. But what do you say?
Are you living your BEST Life now?
If you’re not sure if you are living your best life now, consider the following questions:
- Do you have a clear vision for your life?
- Can you articulate your life calling?
- If today was your last, would you be satisfied with how you would be remembered?
- Do you wake up refreshed?
- Do you typically go to sleep satisfied with your day? How about last night?
- Do you like the story your life is writing?
- Are you growing?
- Do you embrace change?
- Are you clear on your priorities?
- Do you live with an unsettled feeling? That there is more for you to be and to do?
- Are you enjoying healthy relationships? For a simple life-assessment exercise see part one of this series.
- Do you have a plan for your life?
These questions are worth the time and effort to consider and answer. In part because we often don’t. They’re not easy though. Believe me I get. But what’s the alternative? Avoiding the questions won’t bring about the changes in your life you are looking for.
Only by God’s incredible grace, the faithful love and support of family and friends and choosing to live the life I was designed to live was I able to move from a life that was not my best.
Are you living your BEST life now? I hope you are.
If you have questions or would like to explore life coaching but you’re not sure where to begin, contact me to arrange an initial free 30 minute call. Let’s talk. Simply fill out the form below and we can arrange a conversation. I look forward to it.
Great post Dan. This is something that took me a long time to realize and I’m grateful to be doing something of significance now. I think too many of us focus on things that are self indulgent. Money, fame, power. When instead our actions should be outwardly focused at all times. i.e. how do/will my actions affect those around me. I look forward to your next post.
Thank you for your comments Roy. Good reminder that self-indulgence and significance cannot co-exist.