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“My Boss Is Such a Jerk!” And What To Do About It

When I was in college I had a summer job working for a plumber. I didn’t know anything about plumbing when I started and to tell you the truth, I didn’t know a whole lot more by the end of the summer. If I was to be honest, it wasn’t much fun spending day after day with him.

Every morning I’d meet him at his place where he’d walk to the van and mumble something incoherent. He was just kind of grumpy. He didn’t like to teach me much but would get angry when I did something wrong. He gave me all the jobs he didn’t like which I didn’t mind but he did it in a sinister way.

One day we were working in a home in the country and he asked me to bust two holes through concrete walls to run 3-inch pipe through. He handed me the hand-held jackhammer, laughed and said, “You’ll probably be done by morning” and left for the day.

I’d never used this machine before and of course he didn’t show me how to use it so it took me a while to get the hang of it. I was there for a few hours and I was exhausted…but I did it.

The truth is, he was kind of a jerk.

Have you ever had a jerk for a boss? If you have, maybe your experience has left a bad taste in your mouth or a negative view about work and bosses in general?

You’ve probably seen the statistic that the majority of people dislike their jobs. Some research suggests that number is around 75%. But when you drill down on those numbers, I think you might see that the majority of people who are dissatisfied with their job actually like their job; they just don’t like their boss.

Sure our dislike of a boss could stem from a negative view of authority in general, but I think it goes well beyond that.

I came across an article recently that suggested that the majority of “people don’t leave bad jobs, they leave bad bosses.” It seems ironic to me that some managers just don’t know how to manage people. But we’ve all seen them..or worked for them.

Or maybe you’re the jerk boss? I hope not, but if you’re not sure, here are some characteristics of bad bosses, from my own experience.

  • They micromanage people
  • They show favouritism
  • They are about themselves. Their ego is evidenced by how often they use “me” rather than “we”
  • They intentionally intimidate you…in other words, they are a bully
  • They are quick to criticize but slow to express affirmation and appreciation
  • They are emotionally volatile…you never know what you’re going to get day to day. I love roller coasters but not in the workplace.
  • They are moody
  • They sacrifice the process to get results
  • They care about productivity but not the person
  • They “pretend” to value collaboration but in the end do what they want
  • They make excuses for their own behaviour
  • They don’t model what they want from their staff/employees

My Boss Is a Jerk! What Do I do? 

So what do you do if you have a jerk boss? Let me start with a few things that you probably SHOULD NOT DO.

  1. Rant to your bosses boss. This would likely just escalate whatever problem you already have.
  2. Complain to your boss. Relentless badgering won’t get you far.
  3. Take your issues to social media. This is just a bad idea…and could get you fired.
  4. Talk about your issues with co-workers. Don’t contribute to a negative workplace.
  5. Get lazy, be less productive and cut corners on your own work.

You may want to do some or all of those things but they likely won’t get you the results you’re hoping for. It’s easy to develop the mindset that your situation is hopeless…that this is just the way it is…that you have no options.

So what do you do if you have a jerk boss? Let me suggest a few things that you CAN DO.

  • Consider your part. This is hard but ask yourself…is there anything that you might be doing to contribute to your current situation? What changes can you make?
  • Communicate with your boss. This is different from complaining. If you have concerns, offer constructive, specific feedback. Even tough bosses can accept feedback, especially if it includes some possible solutions.
  • Get perspective. Ultimately, you don’t just work for your boss. You work for other reasons too.
    • Who do you work for? Your family? Your kids? For God?
    • Are you in your current role for a specific reason or season? Why do you think that is?
    • Are you gaining something of value beyond your paycheque that will set you up for greater success down the road?
  • Be patient. If your boss is that bad, is there a chance they won’t be around much longer?
  • Consider your options. If your situation is that bad and your future even bleaker, maybe it’s time to look at your options. In today’s market, there are jobs out there. It’s better to leave when it’s your choice.
  • Work hard. This is not the time to slack off. Continue to do your best. Be the employee you’d want to hire. The better you are at what you do and how you do it, the better your opportunities will be. (More on this next week as I talk about your brand)

Are You The Jerk Boss?

Kathy and I opened a cafe just over 3 years ago; she’s really the boss and I’m the dishwasher when I’m there, but together we’ve hired a number of people over that time and currently are blessed with eight staff. Believe me when I say we still have much to learn about being the boss. But here a some observations that I hope will help you.

  1. Communicate clearly starting with the interview process.  The wrong hire is one of the most costly mistakes you can make. If you keep a wrong hire you will become miserable and make everyone around you the same.
  2. Welcome feedback. Some of our staff are not shy about offering suggestions…it could be on a specific process or menu item. That’s awesome. We want them to feel like they are an important part of the cafe. The success of the cafe is a team effort…absolutely.
  3. Train well, then give them space. For example, we have a process for washing dishes. There are certain things that must happen. As I say, “we only wash clean dishes here.” But outside of that, I’ve seen our staff do some unique things as they get over the sinks….and that’s okay.
  4. Offer feedback. Especially for our new staff, we will debrief after a shift to go over, how they felt thy did, what they learned and where they can improve etc.
  5. Care more about your staff as people than employees. As a life coach I can’t help but talk to our staff about their hopes and dreams. Two of our staff are starting college this Fall and another going back for year 3…we care about them…we really do. We try to show interest…and ask questions. I’ve sat with staff from time to time to talk about what’s going on in their life.  We want them to know they can talk to us about anything. I love that
  6. Inspire them. For most of our staff, the cafe is a stop not a destination. So why wouldn’t we do all we can to help them grow while they are with us? They are hopefully gaining life experience working at the cafe that will serve them well in whatever they do in the future.
  7. Express appreciation. We love our staff and try to communicate it to them.
    • A simple, “thank you for your hard work”
    • Birthday flowers
    • Staff party
    • Telling our customers or their family members how much we appreciate them
  8. Treat your staff like people not pawns. They deserve your respect, appreciation and care. They are not a “means to an end”. As the boss my first priority is our staff, not our customers. If our staff know they are loved and respected, if they are enjoying their work and even having fun, then our customers will have a great experience.

“Train people well enough so they can leave, treat them well enough so they don’t want to.’ – Richard Branson

I couldn’t have said it better myself.

You may have a jerk boss or you may be the jerk boss. It doesn’t have to stay that way.

And business is still noble and moral.

Feeling stuck? Not sure what to do next? Your life not where you want it to be? Life coaching can help. Contact me to arrange a free 45-minute discovery call. Let’s talk.

Published inCareersFocusLife CoachingSmall Business

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